For FFXIV, specifically, if you are looking to add some friends I’d say start by hanging out one of the three starting cities (Gridania, Limsa, Ul’Dah) near the Aetherytes. Often people are just hanging and chatting some there. Limsa, on my server at least, seems to just be filled with people all the time hanging out. And you may even see some open calls for people to join Free Companies (Guilds). Those people are actively looking for new blood, so you could start up a discussion with them and see if their group is something you’d like to join. By doing so you may be able to get several friends pretty quick that way. Just remember that you owe nothing to those folks, and if the free company vibe doesn’t feel right once you get in, then bounce.
But commenting on someone’s look is fine, too! People work hard to collect or craft certain pieces of gear and dye them to make their character the way they want so if you notice something cool chances are they will be happy to talk about it.
There was one time last year during a Live Letter (this is a live streamed event the producers of the game do a few times a year) I went to Limsa and said to anyone who could hear it that I’d be “over by [a specific bench] to discuss the Live Letter” and lots of people I didn’t know gathered around and we all had a fun chat about the event as it streamed.
Or even if you have questions, say them out loud in a crowded space and chances are someone will help. FF14 is notorious for people NOT being trash, so most often you’ll find helpers before finding jerks.
And I promise that you can’t out-weirdo the weirdos that run around pretty much any game, so try to not worry about that.
appreciate the advice on getting conversations started. i think i’ll work up the nerve to give that a try in the near future. also, thank you for you can’t out-weirdo… that makes it easier to handle 😀
I’ve had random people whisper me to compliment my character’s hat and ask where did I get the cosmetic in Elder Scrolls Online. To be fair, it was a pretty silly hat.
If they look like there just roaming around, emoting, roll-playing, playing with random items/spells or generally fucking around; there likely feeling social and may respond but each MMO has a different vibe to it. Look for people loudly drawing attention in cites. Wow players tend to group up but not say anything, There is mechanical communication(IE: everyone is in perfect sync in a group activity) but that has a good chance of breaking down at the first sign of trouble. I can’t say much A lot of it is bar level interaction, you hang out for 30 minutes, do your dungeon and move on. If you get along with some one during an activity, send a friend request and they may accept or ignore it, sometime they may sit on it for a bit.
There is a lot of toxicity or other people you will just not , block and move on if its a problem to you, report if it’s still a problem after that. You will never win an argument on the internet. Being a weirdo is normal, and awkward interactions will be common, as that guy has a good chance of being from some country you cant find on the map(or your government may have literally bombed there family yesterday). Noting more honest than 2 randos finding out there at war with each other after spending 2 hours having fun.
a lot of toxicity or other people you I think that’s probably the biggest barrier to being social. not wanting to deal with toxic players is a huge thing from what I have read (Lemmy, Reddit, etc.)
thank you for this, simple but sounds effective. i’ll have to go find the player in T&L that was running around as turkey and asked they pulled that off 🤣
That’s really odd, I’ve never heard of that before and I’ve never had any issues with Nexus but yeah. It looks like Nexus does block some email domains to prevent people from making tons of throwaway or alt accounts, which is kinda shitty.
Looks like GameBanana has some mods for New Vegas, but I am not sure if you will find everything you are looking for there. The vast majority of NV mods are hosted on Nexus. You could also trudge through the smut to see if you can find what you want on Lover’s Lab… but I wouldn’t recommend it.
I know my Nexus account is registered under a Gmail account if you want to try making a throwaway Gmail. Hopefully you’re able to find what you’re looking for!
Edit: wanted to add that there are also NV mods on ModDB
Wait what? Nexus Mods acknowledges a security flaw that had been breached and took action to notify the community and solve the problem and you think that’s shady?
I would avoid zone-wide chats. They end up in pissing contests about who’s cooler, edgier, better, etc. Local or proxy chat let’s you talk to a party directly in front of you, like you are actually addressing the person instead of the name in a chat box.
As to what you should say, say the first thing that comes to mind, short of “want to buy GF”. Find similar minded people. Additionally, join guilds or discords. Check the game sub for guild finder stuff, join medium sized guilds that are doing content you like. Be prepared to leave if you don’t feel like you fit or it doesn’t mesh well. The beauty of MMOs is they generally have a decent sized player base, you’ll find community somewhere. They just rarely come find you.
What I’d say regarding anxiety…everyone has usually been where you are. On ESO, I help run a 1k+ person guild, where most groups are doing hard mode content or trifecta content (speed run, hard mode, no deaths). I don’t want to do the horribly sweaty stuff, but I’ve done some hard modes and such. Decent parse numbers are 110-120k just about, and I hit that. But when I started, I was at like…50k. I joined a group, talked to people, and bit the bullet and let people critique my gameplay. More often than not, if you are asking for help, people will give it and help you along, and that’s a big reason why we grew. We encouraged people to post parses, to show gameplay, so that it could be reviewed and advice given. It wasn’t public, but a fair few of us could see it and give pointers and suggestions.
Everyone starts somewhere. Just take the thoughts out of your head and put it in the chat box, and see who vibes with you!
They just rarely come find you yeah, that makes sense, the onus is on me to find people. agreed on the chat thing. again, still trying to figure it all out but some of the zone / game wide chat is… interesting, to say the least.
i think when a get a little further along, i may look into guilds. my only concern is that it becomes a second full time job. however, as one person mentioned, “leave if you’re not happy” (to paraphrase that posters comment).
will do on the take the thoughts out of your head advice!
Nah, I haven’t played ESO as part of the guild in over a month. I still get on and do some stuff, but it’s solo stuff or just with a group who linked up. Unless you’re joining an end-game guild, I’d say the function is more social than content. T&L maybe a little different, but the point of the big guilds is that you can join, and you have a group of “vetted” players you fit in with to play when you want to. It is what you make of it, y’know?
I’ve played WoW basically since it ever came out like 19/20 years ago, just after Guild Wars 1 and among many other MMOs for shorter times. And communication in MMORPGs has definitely been a lot better back in the days, or at least felt more engaged than it does now. Now it’s often been difficult to get people to talk, even after like a good dungeon run people will often just leave without having said an entire word the entire dungeon. It’s not as chatty as it used to be back in the days, and a lot of people are the toxic type that only respond when something goes wrong.
I think your best bet would be to join guilds in these games. I used to be in great guilds as well, where everyone could talk to each other in guild chat, but it kinda devolved into an alternative looking-for-group chat over the years since most guilds just invite anyone to get the guild bonusses and have easier access to people wanting to do raids and dungeons and stuff.
Guilds often don’t feel like the band of friends they used to be, and more like a collection of people doing the same type of content. It’s like most players just treat MMO games like a second job, they log in, do their chores, and log off again. But you can get lucky and run into a great guild that’s more casual, it heavily depends on the game and servers though.
In the past years I found that local chat is mostly used by roleplayers, WoW has a few servers where a lot of roleplayers flock to, and it really helped make the world feel alive as well. As for everyday non-RP chat, it just feels like most MMO games turned into a singleplayer game where you run around doing your own thing, with a lot of other people that are also playing their own game.
I do think that free-to-play games are worse when it comes to communication though, since anyone can hop in, and it often attracts the most toxic entitled people. The paywall with games like World of Warcraft and Final Fantasy Online definitely help filter out the majority of them though.
On a side note, I often play shooters as well. And I really hated voice chat in basically all of them, since most of them were just kids screaming vile things about mothers and what not, so I just ended up turning it off. Eventually I started playing Squad, which is a more serious Battlefield type of game with voice chat that attracts a more mature audience. At first I was a bit hesitant to use voice chat at all, but now I absolutely love talking with random players and couldn’t imagine the game without voice chat, most fun I’ve had with complete strangers in any game.
Sometimes it’s just a step to get over, and it gets easier. It’s worth giving it a shot in the games you play, but I would say it’s more likely to have a better experience outside of free-to-play games since there’s a lower chance of running into toxic players ruining the vibe.
MMO games turned into a singleplayer game sort of the vibe i get now but, your other advice makes sense. again, i think the guild thing is interesting but, didn’t want it to turn into a job. the free vs. played is an interesting comment. as i progress, i’ll see how that turns out.
the thing with voice chat, TBH, is i’m not sure if i’m hearing people or if it’s “in game stuff”. in TFD the other night i hear “i need help” but i had no way of knowing if it was a person saying it or some in game thing. i’ll have to pay more attention to that.
appreciate your perspective as a long time MMORGP player, this was helpful.
im not social but once I got my chats under control I would joke and clown around on them. Well as well as give advice or do actualy game related talk. To me its sorta like a party and I was more likely to engage socially when I was just hanging for one reason or another and more likely to talk business when the action took place. Like champions had these whole zone super enemies called cosmics that popped every four hours and if you came last minute you would likely get locked out of the full zone and they were impossible to beat below a certain threshold of players. so like you would hang out ten or twenty minutes before and screw around. talk and emotes and whatnot.
when you say got my chats under control does that mean the different types: party vs. world. vs whispers, etc.? that is an area that’s still a little confusing. plus i need to get better at using a controller to chat. thanks for the comments around not being a last minute type player for big events, i’ll keep that in mind.
when i see others doing missions (especially in TFD), i usualy get right in an start helping, even if i did the mission already. i figure worst case, it’s just more practice for me 😀
Nexus mods isn’t shady, they inform user regarding data breach. They provide mods and have been serving mods ever since pre 2010 I believe (registered myself on that site back in 2014 ish).
Maybe slightly off-topic, I recommend to use Viva New Vegas guide as based on my testing the game is more stable and suitable base for modding up your New Vegas install, however also check out every mods you are going to install especially older mods pre-2018 (for me) as they sometime aren’t optimized which may makes unstable issue with the game. Hope you enjoy the New Vegas!
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