I struggle with similar feelings, although in other disciplines. I’m going to ask you the same questions I ask myself because they help center me when I’m in a similar mental space.
Who do you create for? Do you create for those people that don’t value your work? Do you create for yourself, for your own satisfaction? Do you create for external recognition?
I think we’ll turn this corner as a society, especially as everything becomes further enshittified. Inherent value and authenticity, the process and the work are all things that I do believe we all care about, but we’ve been spoiled with the convenience of everything.