Steam is privately held, so there’s plenty of reason to be hopeful. The recent rapid enshittification of what feels like every company is mostly due to US laws that require publicly traded companies to squeeze every last dollar out or face severe penalties. Privately held companies are not subject to those laws, and so they can stay actually decent and care about their customers without threat of legal repercussions. An example is Lego Group - there’s some valid criticism, but legos have stayed a top quality product for nearing a hundred years - and show no signs of suddenly degrading in quality. So, I wouldn’t worry unduly about this until Valve announces an IPO. Then you should start worrying.
It’s more complicated than just one law that says “you must be a bastard” I admit, but fiduciary responsibility is a core requirement of any publicly traded company and very much is legally enforceable (this parenthetical aside stands in for about three pages of niche caveats and overly wordy exceptions that I’m just going to shamelessly handwave away). At best a CEO might be found to be civilly liable, but peasants non-C-suite employees are criminally charged for neglecting their fiduciary duty every day in the US.
The potential for environmental(?) storytelling with this is amazing. Crew that have been hoarding fruit bringing it to you during restricted rations then the rest of the crew finds out and they just stop showing up, or being bribed to redirect better food from the captain’s table, or trying to manage the rationing requirements given to you by an increasingly insane captain while at the same time having to keep the crew happy or they’ll turn on you.
Parrots stuffed with crackers, long saltpork, barrels of infinte biscuits, huge oysters, eldtritch fish, trying to keep the nightmares from stealing your ingredients while still serving dinner on time, your knives all go missing so you have to improvise all your recipies without them…
No Marcus narration. How are they so out of touch with the source material to miss THAT one? And there’s like… five guns. And while I like all the actors, what the hell are they doing playing those characters? Claptrap already had a voice, and it sure wasn’t jack black. Poop jokes. They’d be fine if they were, you know, funny. But they weren’t. How do you fuck up a poop joke?? The absolute lack of a coherent timeline that follows the canon. How is Tiny Tina the most subdued performance in the whole trailer? WHERE THE HELL ARE LILITH’S TATTOOS? Why are the cars so… lame? Why is the part where the narration says “Weirdest and most dangerous world” playing over a shot of random boulders? Why is Roland being played by a comedian? Where the hell is Zer0? Mordecai? HANDSOME JACK? Chris Sabat isn’t listed on the cast so we’re not getting Mr. Torgue. There’s no vending machines. This fight is so rough it looks like I choreographed it. NO HAMMERLOCK.
The Good:
Florian Munteanu (Krieg) doesn’t have a shirt on.
The Bad Again:
This movie isn’t 1hr30min of Florian Munteanu not wearing a shirt and hitting things. Preferably in slow motion, and glistening. Maybe throw in some cute Pandorian animals, too. How cute must a baby skag be? I don’t know, but I want to find out the answer.
I mean come on you could do ANYTHING with this, a feature length movie just of Granny Flexington’s Story Corner would be lauded as one of the best troll moves in history. Sure, I’d go and throw a brick through Gearbox’s windows for that, but I’d make sure nobody was behind said window first. … Probably.
Both this clip and the first clip emphasize the same poop joke. And that’s a problem. Somehow they’ve managed to make poop jokes in Borderlands a problem.
And keep in mind this is the scene the producers and people involved thought was good enough to debut online. This is what they are selling the movie on. This is their big “Take a look at this and get excited!” clip. If that’s the case, well, I fear for the rest of the movie.
Sums it up pretty well. I’m just astounded by how awful this is going to be. This looks bad enough I’m not even going to hate watch it, just… just no.
See its not that the poop jokes are bad its that there’s only one damn joke and they keep recycling it. Like the poop jokes were rarely funny in the games (I’m secure enough to admit that I laughed at more than a few…) but at least there was a variety. This is the same damn one as in trailer #1. What kind of person can’t write two “claptrap shitting bullets” jokes???
ITT: a lot of people worried that one of the few examples of corporate-provided services that isn’t a flaming pile of anti-consumer profit-before-everything garbage is going to be punished for not being that via political ratfucking.
I've never seen a company squander as much goodwill as Blizzard. (lemmy.world) angielski
Someone needs to make this (lemmy.world) angielski
The First Borderlands Movie Clip Looks Like An SNL Skit (kotaku.com) angielski
Today, during IGN Live, we got our first real look at the Borderlands movie, and folks, I’m not sure this is going to be very good....
Court rules Gabe Newell must appear in person to testify in Steam anti-trust lawsuit (www.pcgamer.com) angielski